I forget just how much a layoff effects my family sometimes. There is the obvious loss of my dad's income, but it's the little things I don't consider very often that surprise me because I've simply forgotten to think about them. I went to have a couple of prescriptions filled today and was reminded of the loss of Dad's insurance. The two prescriptions would normally have cost me $20 total, but today they were almost $120. We still have Mom's insurance, so it's not like we're all stepping out into the world without health insurance every day, but Dad's insurance is just better. We're back to the same spot we were in when I needed braces but had to wait because they were going to cost us so much more without Dad's coverage.
And if this didn't put money at the forefront of my mind, the student loan application process is taking care of that. With the layoff of course, I've had to find someone other than my parents to co-sign for me. My aunt is going to take care of that, but my mom is ready to kill me because it's frustrating to apply for a loan when she is filling out the paper work, I have to call the company, and my aunt has to contribute information too--all of this is made especially difficult because we are in three different locations, and we all work during the hours the loan company is open. My mom thinks I don't care because I won't just do all this myself, but the reason I don't is because there are questions I can't answer. I would be fine if we could sit down and do them together, but we don't live in the same place.
And to emphasize how serious I am about the loan process, while I was writing that last paragraph, my aunt called and we re-applied online ourselves. This is getting ridiculous, and I only hope that we are approved and don't have to go through this again until next year. It shouldn't be this complicated to go $18,000 in debt.
So for now I'm a little worried and uneasy about life because I don't know exactly how I'm going to make it. I'm trying to live on my itty-bitty salary because I know how hard things are for my family, and that's proving to be a test--especially now that my prescriptions are outrageously expensive. And the insane debt I am incurring is not making matters any better.
As stressed as I am (although I'm nowhere near as stressed as my mother), I'm realizing more and more all the time that this is the time for me to put into practice the things God was teaching me at the beginning of the summer. There was a reason this ResLife job fell into my lap and provided housing, and there's a reason I found a job while all my other friends were struggling. God was showing me that he's providing for me. I can't sit here now that things aren't as easy as they were before Dad stopped working and forget about God's faithfulness and his provision thus far. As long as I'm where he wants me, he'll be taking care of me. He has to keep reminding me, but it's finally starting to sink in.